Review: Mortuary Spawn ‘Spawned From The Mortuary’ EP

It’s a fifteen minute EP. It’s disgusting. You see the cover. You knew it was going to be dirty. I think I’m focusing on that so much because I made the very real mistake to do laundry to this beast. Now all my clothes are ripped up and there’s bleach everywhere. But in good news the threat of black mold is gone and I’ve never had more fun washing sheets.

Mortuary Spawn ‘Spawned From The Mortuary’

Instead of the band actually playing instruments, each member is possessed by a cosmic demon working through them. They don’t have last names because demons don’t do them. PSYCHOTIC PLEXIMETRY is handled by Ben. HEATHENGUT MANIPULATOR could only be handled by Jack. OXIDISED PORTCULLIS AGITATION is played by Ben. Is it a different Ben? We’ll never know. CRUEL CONTORTION OF TAUT TENDONS has actually been the family curse of Joe so he’s been born into that one. And HELMINTHIC DECLARATION isn’t sung through George. Dude just opens his mouth and it seeps out. Okay. Maybe they’ve taken cool expressions and I’ve romanticized what musicians do. Look it’s fun and I like it.

Like a kick in the stomach leading to an unexpected trip down a hill CREPUSCULAR IMPERILMENT begins with jarring blast beats and a complete disregard for your well being in any way. Vocals had to be recorded through a Brillo Pad filled with rust and blood. These drums hit so fast you may have moved your spine from the involuntary moshing to assure steady work for your chiropractor.

a short cathartic romp…

Coming in like a group of Neanderthals discovering Satan for the first time ‘NEATH THE MOUND OF MURIDS establishes itself with more power chords and fury than before. THORAX AND ABDOMEN sounds like Motörhead worshipping grind-core. ODIOUS, THE CHARNEL MIASMA begins with a breakdown, falls onto another one, to another and another. It’s just all breakdowns. SPAWNED FROM THE MORTUARY is a lot of the same. Oh. Oh okay. It’s over now. If you’ve made it through just hit repeat. You’ll know within ten seconds whether you love it or hate it. There isn’t a lot of varying sounds but instead of wearing out it’s welcome, it’s just a short cathartic romp.

Why I insisted on doing my laundry during this listen I will never know. I decided to eat all my Tide Pods (that’s laundry detergent to non-Americans) as I lost a lot of calories moshing with myself so I need to have my stomach pumped. Just listen to this and release all your anger without even having to leave your home. Last thing worth mentioning; this band proved on their Bandcamp the caps lock really does make everything more intense.

PS – Please don’t actually eat Tide Pods!!!

Label: Chamber Of Emesis
Band Links: Facebook | Bandcamp | Instagram

Scribed by: Richard Murray